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How I would kill you all

Discussion in Everything & Anything started by Mad Hatter, Aug 27, 2010

  1. Aug 3, 2010
    Go all die in a fire. That goes double for you flying avacado

    1. Basic Hacksaw.
    2. Shooting
    3. Cyanide
    4. Rigging a snapple bottle with coke and mentos so it explodes
    5. Trip them and make them fall onto a flipped chair's exposed leg
    6. Punch them in the stomach then step on their eyes with high heeled shoes when they're down.
    7. Set up a mine to blow up their family. Mines availible at Wal-Mart
    8. Put disinfecting spray in their morning coffee.
    9. Just throw an axe at the mother****er.
    10. Before they go to the bathroom, pour vegetable oil all over the front of the toilet so they sleep and kill themselves.
    11. If they sleep in a bunk bed, make a noose for them and put them close to the edge so when they wake up they'll hang themselves.
    12. When they're holding their ford straight up in the air, kick them in the back of the head. Yay, eye-kebobs
    13. Bring their head down until you knee them in the nose, then just continue to beat the **** out of him.
    14. Sneak up behind and snap his neck.
    15. Mustard Gas.
    16. Drop a history book on them from a third story landing. The impact will snap their spine.
    17. Toss them down the stairs.
    18. Buy a tube of Bromine, and hit him in the mouth with it.
    19. take a "slush" straw and stab him in the throat with it, then spit water through the straw
    20. Glue a funnel in his throat and pour in high pulp orange juice
    21. Put heavy medications in his oatmeal. O.D. HIS ASS
    22. Buy a high-heeled shoe and beat his head in with it.
    23. Toss him out a third story window.
    24. Make him piss off kelly pauley.
    25. Grenade in pillow.
    26. Hit him over the heat with a hammer.
    27. Buy a showerhead at Lowe's and ram it through his eye.
    28. When he's sleeping, stuff "stuffed animal" stuffing into his mouth.
    29. Pour rock salt in his popcorn.
    30. Put lysol in his lemonade.
    31. Slit his throat with a razor.
    32. Lodge scissors in his throat.
    33. Put his head in the toilet and close the lid. Then jump on it.
    34. Turn on a hair curler, then beat him to death with it.
    35. "The Joker Pencil Trick"
    36. Take a bunch of kitchen knives, and the wooden thing that holds them, and throw them at him.
    37. Go up behind him and strangle him with Chicken wire.
    38. Throw him the radio in the bathtub.
    39. Put him in a chair where he cant move, and a cage is attached to his face, and in that cage are three starving rabid rats. (Do it to juuuuliaaaaa!) -Orwell reference
    40. Tip over a bookshelf onto him.
    41. Push an airconditioner out a window that he's walking by.
    42. Throw ceramic plates at him.
    43. Put gorilla glue on the inside of a bag, then put it over his head. Push it into his mouth and nose.
    44. Stick a needle in the back of his neck.
    45. Punch him in between the ribs as high as you can to hit and stop his heart.
    46. Put a joystick in his mouth, then punch the base. IT WILL GO THROUH HIS HEAD.
    47. Stab him with a pocket knife.
    48. Stab him with a BIGGER knife.
    49. Stab him with a sword.
    50. Buy a chainsaw. 'Nuff said.
    51. Hit him with a baseball bat.
    52. Throw a potted plant on his head when your above him.
    53. Bash him over the head with a heated skillet.
    54. Run him through with an umbrella.
    55. Plunge a hunting knife into the back of his head.
    56. Lead pipe.
    57. Use some hedge clippers on all his limbs and let him bleed out.
    58. Bash his head with a 2 x 4.
    59. Run at him swinging a barbell.
    60. Run at him swinging a dumbell if the barbell is too heavy.
    61. Throw him at cactus. Then hit him with a meat cleaver.
    62. Bash him on the spine with an electric guitar, preferrably a Les Paul.
    63. Tilt up a lawnmover so the blades are explosed and run at him with it.
    64. Ram a hanger into his throat.
    65. Beat him to death with a hockey stick.
    66. Buy a mailbox. Go to his house. And ram the mailbox pole through his stomach... then raise the little mailbox flag to add insult to serious injury.
    67. Nailgun
    68. Fill a watergun with acid... and have at him.
    69. Cuz of his leg and beat him to death with it.
    70. Smash a rock over his head. A BIG ROCK.
    71. Club him.
    72. Smash him in the side of the face with a shovel, then spike in into his stomach when hes on the ground.
    73. Weave his arm through a stepladder, then close at and break his arm, then twist it off, then beat him to death with the STEPLADDER.
    74. Beat that tool with a toolbox.
    75. Buy a sickle... and go Blue Oyster Cult on his ass.
    76. Beat him with a paint can.
    77. Throw a TV on his head.
    78. Wrap a phone wire around his throat and pull.
    79. Beat him to death with a 9I.
    80. Same as number 79, but switch it over to.. a pitching wedge.
    81. BEARS!
    82. Ram a weed whacker into his stomach and turn that bad boy on.
    83. Ram his head repeatedly into the corner of.. well... anything.
    84. Throw a saw blade at him.
    85. Get a car. Hit him.
    86. Get a car. Invite him to ride in passenger seat. Put on your seat belt... but saw his seat selt off before he gets in the car. Accelerate to 120 MPH... then brake.
    88. Beat him over the head with a bowling ball.
    89. Hold his head under sand.
    90. Cement shoes... toss him into a lake.
    91. Kick him off of a highway overpass.
    92. Kick him out of a speeding car into a metal divider.
    93. Install and ejector seat in a car. Drive the car, have him sit in passenger seat, go into a tunnel, and hit eject.
    94. Pour gasoline of him and light that piece of **** up.
    95. Grab him, run as fast as you cant towards a doorknob, and throw him so it hits him in the forehead.
    96. Spike his forehead on a picket fence.
    97. Machete. Jason style.
    98. If he's thirsty, how about a Molotov Cocktail?
    99. Throw him in front of a speeding car.
    100. Ram paperclips under his fingernails... then stick them all in outlets.
    101. Impale him by dropping a ladder vertically on him.
    102. Severe Docking
    103. Borrow a retired soviet tank and blow his head off
    104. Place a bomb on his phone and get your "one phone call"
    105. Drown them in their own tears
    106. Set up a landmine in front of their house.
    107. Set up a sniper rifle, and wait for them to look out the window.
    108. Say "finish him" in a deep voice, then rip out his skull and spine.
    109. Lock him in a stone box, and give him enough food for a week. Then leave.
    110. Lock him in a stone box, and give him no food. Then leave.
    111. Lock him in a stone box, then blow up the damn box.
    112. Feed him peanut butter. SALMONELLA, HO!
    113. Leave him outside in the winter, with only a popsicle and a coolata to sustain himself.
    114. Tie a noose around his neck, cut open his stomach, and hang him.
    115. De-bowel his ass.
    116. Tie him on railroad tracks. It never seems to work in cartoons... MAKE HISTORY.
    117. Glue is mouth shut, and send him to Iran wearing a "God bless America- and nowhere else" shirt.
    118. Offer him two pills... one red, one blue. (They're both cyanide)
    119. Set it up so when he hits Ctrl+Alt+Delete, his computer blows up. Then, wait till hes on a porn site.
    120. Torch his face.
    121. Throw him down an elevator shaft.
    122. Drive and SUV down said elevator shaft.
    123. Break into the gas company and send all the major gaslines to his house.
    124. Smash him on the side of the face with a metal rake.
    125. Stab him in the back, and use his corpse to make cookies.
    126. Hide in his ceiling, then reach down, grab his head, and pull it up.
    127. Stick a carrot in his mouth, then punch it.
    128. Pump propane into his house. Then shoot him.
    129. Buy him a pet Mogwai. Then feed it ice after midnight. (Mogwais are gremlins)
    130. Bend a paper clip to make a needle-like shape. Lodge it in his forhead, and begin to party.
    131. Ring the doorbell. When he looks through the peep-hole, stick a knife through it.
    132. Throw zombies at him. Hey, I'm on number 132, I can get a LITTLE unrealistic... goddamn
    133. Mess with gym equipment so two dumbells come at his head from opposite sides.
    134. According to health freaks, feed him trans fats.
    134. (Cuz the last one didn't count) Throw him into an industrial cooling system.
    135. Push him into a woodchipper.
    136. Throw his cat into a woodchipper, then kick him while he's crying.
    137. Tell him nobody loves him and that nobody would care if he killed himself. (He'll kill himself)
    138. Tell him to walk on the sidewalk of Stanton street with keys in his shirt pocket. It's so icy, NOBODY can NOT fall.
    139. Stick needles in a baseball, like a pincushion, and make him catch it... with his face.
    140. Put a mixture of jell-o and needles into a turkey baster and squeeze.
    141. Force feed him clothes.
    142. Throw him through a sliding glass door
    143. Close a window on his throat.
    144. Send him up a ladder, and put oil on the top 4 rungs.
    145. Pull out an RPG and take out his house.
    146. Puts all the pegs in a Cribbage board, then smash his face into it.
    147. Beat him with a chain.
    148. Stick a nail through wood and hit him with it.
    149. Take apart a pencil sharpener until all thats left is the spinning blade... then "sharpen" him.
    150. Make a prison shank out of a toothbrush and take him out.
    151. Shoot him in the knee and then tie him down until he bleeds out.
    152. Use a mallet and chisel to carve him a new face.
    153. Put his head in a desk drawer and kick it closed.
    154. Throw him into a printing press.
    155. Tie him onto a log and send him towards a saw blade.
    156. Open the gas intake hole in a plane he's flying in. When it starts taking of, set the resulting trail on fire and say "Yippe Kay Yay"
    157. Put a bomb on a bus he's in. IF HE GOES ABOVE 50, HE DIES.
    158. Just shoot him in the forehead.
    159. Ram C.D.'s through his neck.
    160. Make him piss of Chuck Norris.
    161. Throw him into a shark tank at the aquarium.
    162. BEARS!
    163. Ram some "Stiffy" brand fabric stiffner (actually EXISTS, not as a joke, either) up his ass and then set it on fire.
    164. Put a bear trap in a pie and feed it to him.
    165. Beat him to death with his own shoes.
    166. BEARS!
    167. Mix his soda with bleach.
    168. Mix his oatmeal with bleach.
    169. Do something that involves POISONING HIM WITH BLEACH.
    170. BEARS!
    171. Throw coffee in his face, then smash the cup over his head.
    172. Kick him into a well in the middle of town.
    173. Run a spear through him.
    174. Drive-by.
    175. Drive-by OLD SCHOOL (With a sword on a horse)
    176. Beat him to death with a hand mirror.
    177. Find a pointy glass lamp. Push him onto it.
    178. ..........BEARS!
    179. (There will be five here, because numbers 81, 162, 166, 170, and 178 don't count)
    I. Stick an outlet plug into his skull.
    II. Stick pens in his ears.
    III. Key him. Like keying a car, but it's his eyes.
    IV. Push him out a first story window. Then drop a computer on him.
    V. Throw him into a large searchlight.
    180. Break off the lower part of a hole puncher and make him pay... with his eyeballs.
    181. Tie him in the back of a car.
    182. Glue him in the drivers seat of a car and put a brick on the pedal.
    183. Beat him to death with a binder.
    184. Find a cubicle. Lead him into it, then throw him through the wall. Push the rest of it onto him.
    185. Throw a table out a window onto him.
    186. Push a vending machine onto him.
    187. Throw him into one of those "skill crane" games, throguh the glass, and use the glaw to gouge his eyes.
    188. Put a fishing hook into his nose.. and coming out his forehead...
    189. Smash him in the face with a helmet while he's stapped to a chair.
    190. Starve him to death by tying him up under a tree with fruit on branches he can't reach.
    191. Make him cease to exist.
    192. Use the keyboard you're typing your comment on to smash him in the back of the head.
    193. Put two rats in a metal bucket.. flip the bucket over so the open side is against his stomach.. heat up the bucket. THE RATS ONLY HAVE ONE WAY OUT...
    194. Smash picture frames over his head, in chronological order by date taken.
    195. Throw him into the corner of a dishwasher.
    196. Take the drawer you keep all your cutlery in and smash it over his head.
    197. Smash his head through the glass of a microwave and turn that killer on.
    198. Smash his head through the glass of a TOASTER OVEN and turn it on "Broil"
    199. Hold his face down on a stove and set it on "hi"
    200. Tip over a refridgerator onto him.
    201. Lock him into a tanning bed and crank it up to full blast.
    202. Fire a rocket directly into his face.
    203.throw a rattle snake at him
    204. Throw him up a set of stairs and then when he rolls down...shoot him in the face.
    205. Call Jigsaw and have him do your dirty work
    205. dig a ditch set him on fire and push him into it and proceed to bury him alive.
    207. pit of any sort of hungry big cat
    208. drop his ass off a cliff
    209. hit wazwaz's girlfriend
    210. have him wear OSU gear around wazwaz
    211. Shoot him while sleeping
    212. Give him a poisoned donut.
    213: Attach a heavy or sharp object to your foot and then punt him in the head
    214. Drop him into a pool of magma
    215. paint him gold
    216. punch him.......with brass knuckles
    217. go Hannibal Lector on his ass
    218. crucify him
    219. crucify him then set the cross on fire
    220. stab him with a cross
    221. beat him to death with a cross
    222. impale him with the American flag
    223. impale him with any flag
    224. lock him in a room with the Jonas brothers
    225. feed him to the lions
    226. feed him to the tigers
    227. have him hold a grenade with his hands then take out the pin. He has to let go at some point
    228. lock him in the trunk of a car. Then run over it with a monster truck
    229. dress him in a blue shirt then drop him off in a territory run by the bloods
    230. push him off a bridge
    231. strangle him with a bungee cord
    232. drop a tank on him
    233. fire him out of a cannon and into a wall
    234. make him jump the shark and fail
    235. piranha anyone?
    236. break his leg then beat him with his own crutch
    237. give him paper cuts on his eyes then kick him into a pit
    238. stone him
    239. throw a raccoon at him
    240. throw a weasel at him
    241. throw any animal that has sharp claws and teeth
    242. aim all of the 4th of July fireworks at his house.
    243. smother him in his sleep
    244. brainwash his mother to kill him.
    245. brainwash his sister to kill him
    246. brainwash his dog to kill him
    247. throw him in a bonfire
    248.throw him into a mosh pit….they have bats
    249. reenact the Texas chainsaw massacre…..he’s first
    250. Machine gun. Rambo style
    251. fire him into space. No one can hear him scream but you can watch him die
    252. hit him with a wooden bat
    253. hit him with a metal bat
    254. hit him with a sledge hammer
    255. put had on anvil, take hammer and swing
    256. push him off the Eiffel Tower
    257. tie him to the roller coaster tracks then go for a free ride
    258. put him in a trash compactor
    258. ****ing pipe bomb up his ass
    259. have him fight a kangaroo. The kangaroo will win
    260. have him fight Bruce Lee
    261. dress him in red then lock him in a ring full of pissed off bulls
    262. put him in a casket then set it on fire
    263. put him in a casket then blow it up
    264. put him in a casket the run it over with an 18 wheeler
    265. tie him to the back of a car. Then speed over a bumpy road with tons of broken glass and jagged metal.
    266. Go Freddy Kruger on his ass
    267. put his head in a metal box then fill it up with jello
    268. same as above but use acid instead you ****
    269. run with scissors and plunge those into his skull
    270. put a carnivorous ear wig into his ear. It will eat his brain
    271. give him a bath……an acid bath
    272. have him challenge chuck norris
    273. take a stick and shove it up their ass. Then set the stick on fire. He will burn from the inside
    274. give him an ice cream headache…………..from hell
    275. run him over with the ice cream truck
    276. decapitate him then throw his head into a meatpacking plant
    277. make him see the light……….of an oncoming train
    278. Giant fan? Why not
    279. cause a stamped and watch as he gets trampled
    280. give it thirty lashes then strangle it
    281. run him over with a combine
    282. move him, his family, and their house to tornado ally
    283. play golf with his eyes
    284. beat him with a bible
    295. steal an old mans cane then break it over his head
    286. have him cut his wrists then you slice his throat. ****ing Emos
    287. tell him to go near the president and watch as he gets tackled by the secret service
    288. taze him bro…….over and over again
    289. have a fat woman have sex with him. Her weight will crush him
    290. blow up the church that hes praying in.
    291. take his tie and feed it through two huge rolling drums
    292. crush him with a steam roller
    293. take off your belt and choke him with it
    294. strap fireworks to his bed when hes sleeping so when they go off he has a heart attack.
    295. give him a prop gun and call the police. When the police show up they will think that its real and shoot him.
    296. put a bomb in his mouth and tape it shut.
    297. take the holy wine and poison it
    298. Strangle him with a telephone cord
    299. while hes on a unicycle, push him down a hill
    300. say “This is Sparta!” then kick him into a pit of death
    301. build a house of straw for him then when hes inside burn it down
    302. crash a plain into him
    303. global warming
    304. a tree falls on him in the middle of a forest and no ones is around. Does he make a sound?
    305. when your on a boat push him overboard
    306. have him disappoint Russia, they will kill him “I must break you”
    307. Use a shamwow. Not only will it kill him but it will also clean up the blood
    308. he does ab crunches you do body crunches. You crush him with a car compactor
    309. kill him with kindness
    310. Blind him then hit him with a brail book
    311. blind him then give him a sign in brail that reads look up. Drop a piano on him
    312. Have Buddha take him out
    313. use a katana, Ninja style
    314. beat him with a trashcan
    315. stab him with a lance
    316. stab him with a spoon
    317. toss him him into the NY sewers. The gators will finish him off
    318. Dora the Explorer
    319. ****ing France
    320. rip out his intestines and hang him with them
    321. flamethrower………think about it
    322. burn him at the stake
    323. leave him alone with Hillary Clinton, he will die
    324. Martha Stewert shanking. Glittering and Beddazled shank extra $5
    325. guillotine
    326. open the ark of the covenant and run away
    327. those ****ing vampires
    328. shove food down his throat
    329. drown him in his own blood
    330. put him in the whack the weasel game and try to get the high score
    331. give him a defective gas mask then let loose some poison gas
    332. put each limb in a bear trap then take out a chainsaw
    333. old school rifle shooting, shoot him and if he is still alive stab him with a bayonet
    334. hot potato with a handgernade
    335. go skydiving but replace his parachute with and april fools sign. For better results due this the day after april fools
    336. knock him down then start tap-dancing on their ass
    337. put him in a shopping cart going down hill through a mine field
    338. put on Dragula by Rob Zombie and turn the volume to the max. Then go on a killing spree
    339. fill his house with carbon monoxide
    340. raise zombies and have them attack him
    341. same as above but they are Nazi zombies
    342. put him in an iron maiden
    343. just drown the ****.
    344. lock him in a meat locker
    345. lock him in a meat locker with German shepherds
    346. knock him out them put a bomb in his balls, wait for him to jerk off
    347. curb stomp with golf shoes
    348. bring London Bridges down on his head
    349. have sex with Madonna, die of stds
    350. shave their ass and have them smoke it, they will kill themselves
    351. medicine ball dodgeball
    352. put their head in a locker then kick it shut
    353. have them piss off the short bus kids
    354. lock them in a dark room for ten years with cheeseburgers and spikes on the floors
    355. impale them on a spear on a fountain
    356. replace his parachute with a fan
    357. pluck every hair from his body then make a noose out of the hair
    358. have him make fun of big foots feet
    359. have him listen to a Hanna Montana record
    360. put him in a war between pirates and ninjas
    361. put him in a war between KFC and Popeyes
    362. have him go hunting with Dick Cheney
    363. have him swallow a tree seed then have it grow inside him
    364. have him swallow a sword then punch him
    365. dress him up in a bear outfit then put him in the middle of a hunting ground
    366. push him really fast in a swivel chair, down the stairs
    367. push him really fast in a swivel chair of a cliff
    368. replace his steroids with Oreos
    369. replace his drugs with cookie dough
    370. shoot him with a staple gun
    371. hang them with their own tie
    372. have him save Timmy from a well, then sick Lassie on him
    373. get a dog that looks like his ,pretend to throw it into a fire, shoot him
    374. go on a rollercoaster, cut his safety rope
    375. go on a rollercoaster, cut his throat
    376. but him a ford mustang, ram him with an 18 wheeler
    377. take him on a cruise, throw him into the propellers
    378. replace water on his slip N’ slide with sulfuric acid
    379. shove your dick in his ear, break through the other ear
    380. shove ten pounds of cream cheese up his ass, clog his intestines, make his stomach explode
    381. tie them to a chair, cover them in chees, lock them in a room with rabid rats
    382. bring him to a Jonas brother concert, he will kill himself, but you may die as well
    383. have Metallica kick his ass till hes dead
    384. have him drink moxie soda
    385. stick his head into a fan, shoot him in the head
    386. engrave kill me in his forehead, have him walk through the Bronx
    387. Go to a Buddhist temple , tell him it’s a rave party
    388. give him a paper cut with every page from the bible
    389. replace holy water with acid, throw it on him during church, they will try to kill him
    390. shove a jar of Tylenol down his throat
    391. order a pearl harbor at a sushi restaurant
    392. have midgets eat him, starting from ankles
    393. tell him you hired a nappy headed ho for him, its really a dude, he kills himself
    394. have Randy Newman write a song about him
    395. put him on a blob and have an obese kid jump on it
    396. throw midgets at him
    397. drive his car off a cliff have it land next to him, then have a trap door drop him into a snake pit
    398. make him watch his grandparents have sex
    399. smash him with a tire iron
    400. call down the killer tomatoes
    401. call down the killer vegetables
    402. put his power level over 9000
    403. KAMEHAMEHA!!!
    404. Green people from Dragon ball Z
    405. summon demons to rape his nostrils
    406. place squirrels in his brain
    407. place him under a tree with a fat squirrel
    408. tell a group of rabbits that hes made out of carrots
    409. pare his eyes hard
    410. tie him to a buoy in shark infested waters
    411. while he sleeps move his bed into shark infested waters
    412. while he sleeps put a shark in his bed
    413. shove a katana up his nose
    414. molest an alligator and blame him
    415. dress him up as a penguin and introduce him to Shamoo
    416. have him call a lion a tiger
    417. go mortal combat on his ass
    418. have him watch pink floyds The Wall while chewing jerky
    419. put him in a battle between a dragon and a tiger
    420. make him challenge mogan freeman
    421. have say what to Sam L Jackson
    422. have him smoke weed with Nelson Mandela and Willy Nelson
    423. throw a tattooed baby at him
    424. put a hamster in his pants
    425. put a lion in his pants
    426. put a flaming lion in his pants
    427. BREAK YO SELF
    428. piss big Willy off
    429. go in a helicopter and throw him up
    430. put a trampoline under a helicopter and tell him to jump out
    431. collapsible trampoline
    432. have your henchmen kick him in the shins till death
    433. X gonna give it to him
    434. kelteridas
    435. dress him in a collared shirt and drop him off in LA
    436. lock him in a box and threaten to drop a caterpillar in it
    437. water bored torture him, then actually torture him
    438. chop off his dick, he’ll have no more reason to live
    439. throw him off a helicopter into North Korea
    440. put him on a plane to North Korea
    441. put him on a boat going to Somalia
    442. take him out with a bowling ball shoe
    443. take him out with a bowling ball
    444. drop a possum in his shirt
    445. feed him a possum tell him your both going to France, suicide
    446. tell him your both going to Africa, they’ll eat him
    447. lock him in a park filled with yellow jello
    448. drop him off in Mexico naked
    449. have him drink Mexican water
    450. lock him in a bank vaul
    451. put him as a carry on bag and open the back
    452. disguise him as a piñata, tie him to a tree in Mexico
    453. stab him with shark teeth
    454. throw him into a fish factory
    455. have him fight cannibal corpse
    456. run over him with a Dragula
    457. put bats in his shirt, Play Rob Zombie loud
    458. shoot a grenade at him while he is talking to a girl, **** block kill
    459. have him slip on dog **** and land in a cage of pit bulls
    460. take him to a zoo and he “falls’ into the wolf pit
    461. beat him with a pot of gold
    462. shove a shillelagh up his ass
    463. drop him on the statue of liberty’s spikes
    464. have a ninja guinea pig attack him
    465. throw **** in his mouth, tape it shut, tie his hands throw him in a sewer
    466. make him watch his grandparents and his younger brother get it on
    467. smash his head throw a TV screen
    468. drown someone in a pool of buckshot
    469. Stick a fork in their eye and pull it out the back of their head.
    470. Mac Attack
    471. Mr. Smith
    472. beat him by using a gang of biker midgets
    473. drink him under the table, die of alcohol poisoning
    474. strap him down from head to toe then break out a buzz saw
    475. If you can dodge a ball of spikes then you can live. Did I mention that they are fired from a cannon and the balls are 10 ft in diameter
    476. the purple Kool-Aid guy burst through the wall. The ruble from the wall crushes the kool-aid guy and the person your trying to kill
    477. pimp slap him and make him your ho. Then waste him after you got your money
    478. pimp cane hurts
    479. have him wacked by the Don
    480. Drown him in his own blood
    481. take a pool ball and shove it through his skull
    482. take a magic eight ball and shove it through his skull. Like magic
    483. kick him into a volcano
    484. tie both his arms to a pole then tie his legs to a truck. Step on the gas and rip the **** in half
    485. Smash an electric guitar over his head
    486. smash a bass guitar over his head
    487. smash an acoustic guitar over his head smash a ukulele over his head
    488. put him in a German death camp
    489. go back in time and take the ten commandment and break them over Moses head
    490. tape him to a wall and throw darts at him
    491. tape him to a wall and throw knives at him
    492. put him in a microwave
    493. put him in a oven
    494. send him to the center of the Earth and let the mole people deal with him
    495. build the worlds largest blender then drop him into it.
    496. create a black hole under his bed
    497. do what Gandhi did, Starve him until Muslim and everyone else gets along. If they do then still let him starve
    498. Werewolves
    499. put a death mask on him (from Saw) but don’t give him the key
    500. Watch House of 1000 Corpse then you’ll get the idea. HEY ITS ****ING#500! Give me a break. This is a lot of work even for me.
    501. Throw him off the Sears Tower
    502. Open him up, line is intestines with Christmas lights then plug him in
    503. Superglue his mouth on top of an anthill
    504. The ants are red
    505. Let’s call it acupuncture
    506. Three words: flesh eating Hamsters
    507. Tell France and England that he is the rightful king to both their countries, they will have a tug of war with him as the rope
    508. Tie him in a blanket and roll him off a cliff
    509. The blanket is barbed wire
    510. Inject tape worms into him
    511. Send chucky after his ass
    512. Keep putting heavy big rocks on him till hes dead
    513. Teach him soulja boy…hell kill himself
    514. Take a pointy stick, shove it threw him then leave it sticking up from the ground
    515. Take the dull end of the stick and shove it through his ass, after days his weight will make it go through his organs killing him.
    516. "Dr Kevorkian id like you to meet your new patient..."
    517. face him with 3 pistols .. tell him he has to chose the one without ammunition and he wont get shot . (theyre all loaded)
    518. dare him to attempt Houdini's water trick
    519. staple every inch of his body to a target .. time for archery !
    520. Tell him to open a store in Rochester, when hes not looking put a sign in his window that says “****s need not apply”
    521. get 10000 angry midgets and make them stampede over him
    522. .. make him listen to sanjaya
    523. Slit his throat with his own fingernails,
    524. cut his toes off and shove them down his throat
    525. dry out marshmallows make him eat 200 and then stick a funnel in his mouth and pour in water,
    Smash a shovel over his head and repeatedly stab him with the shattered ends of it if it breaks upon his now fractured skull.
    526. take a poisonous snake, and stab him repeatedly with the venom fangs . to make him die faster, feel free to strangle him with the snake
    527. extreme bungee jumping... without the bungee
    528. send him to the hotel in the shinning. leave him with a creepy child that talks to his finger. see what happens.
    529. (almost) drown him. its time for a nice, toasty,- burning at the stake!..
    530. Dress him up as Rhianna then piss off Chris brown
    531. Cover him in blood then introduce him to a great white
    532. Cover him in pork chops then feed him to two wolverines
    533. Mutated Centaur
    534. Tie him inside a Merry go round then install a turbo setting
    535. Pull a Sweeny Todd
    536. Make him captain of the Titanic 2
    537. Send him to Mexico City (swine Flu)
    538. Replace his vitamins with birth control, his ball will mutate and turn into ovaries and kill him
    539. Send him anywhere with Muslims
    540. Fill a baseball with nitroglycerin then pitch it at him
    541. The knee splitter
    542. Put him on a train then derail it
    543. The rack
    544. Strangle him with rosary beads
    545. Fat guy on a unicycle
    546. If he is allergic to bees, throw a beehive at him
    547. Artillery barrage his car
    548. Artillery barrage his school
    549. Artillery barrage his work
    550. Artillery barrage his home
    551. If he is allergic to peanut butter, force feed him peanut butter
    552. Have him piss off the pope
    553. Have him piss off Jesus
    554. Have him piss off God
    555. Have him piss off Buddha
    556. Have him piss off Oprah
    557. Have him attack Oprah
    558. Put him in a rocket hen fire it to the sun
    559. Iron Maiden!!!!
    560. Godzilla!!!!!!!
    561. Dress him up as a woman then give him to King Kong
    562. Take off his helmet in space
    563. The Hanson Brothers (slapshot 2)
    564. Hells Angels
    565. Heavens Devils
    566. Charlie’s Angels
    567. Lock him in a porta potty, push it into a ditch then fill the ditch with cement
    568. Go to the top off the 16th Chapel then push him off
    569. The Pear…..fordo
    570. Smash cans against his head until they go through
    571. Same as above but use Fanta cans (preferably purple ones)
    572. take a red hot poker and stab him in the eye, then kick it through his head
    573. hide him under a mattress then have a really fat guy sit on it. It will crush him
    574. dress him up as a cat then throw him in a dog pound
    575. dress him as a gorilla then give him to a horny male gorilla
    576. if he is a Muslim send him back in time to the Spanish inquisition
    577. take a big stick, shove it up his ass, then throw him into a freezer to die. You now have a human Popsicle
    578. look!.... its Chris Hanson
    579. play basket ball with his head
    580. play golf with his balls and use his mouth as a tee
    581. put him in a UFC match against Frank Mir and bribe the ref not to stop the fight
    582. give him a cigar, cigar is loaded with highly explosive chemicals
    583. same as above but also give one to his little sister to add insult to death
    584. have him commit suicide Kurt Kobain style
    585. have him steal cookies from the cookie monster
    586. lock him in the trunk of a car, park the car on a railway track. Have two trains on the same track, coming from both directions, hit the car at the same time. Everybody dies.
    587. trap him on an island with other people and let nature take its course. Lord Of the Flies without the happy ending.
    588. throw him into an insane mosh pit.
    589. Kill him just like how South Park killed chef
    590. kill him just like how the Jonas Brothers killed music
    591. Kill him just like how the Twilight moves killed all vampires myths.
    592. train an elephant to crush his head with its feet.
    593. slowly lower him into a pool of hungry mutated sea bass. Then turn around not making sure that they are dead. Austin Powers reference.
    594. Use the Holy hand grenade of Antioch
    595. water balloon fight with acid
    596. Eres tu Maria?
    597. make him hang with steve-O
    598. lock him in a room with and xbox addict with a red ring
    599. whos the boss marathon
    600. make him fight Tony Danza
    601. Make him look at Tony Danza
    602. shove a cherry bomb in his pee hole
    603. replace his balls with cherry bombs, commence to ball tap
    604. make him do a salsasnack, he’ll kill himself
    605. shoot his balls with a staple gun. Put a mask on him and burn it to his skin.
    606. dump him into a pool of chlorine
    607. force a jar of gun cleaner down his throat
    608. throw him into a heart shaped box then push it off a cliff
    609. make him piss of a punk soul brother
    610. feed him ball bearings then put him in a room filled with magnets
    611. attach a powerful magnet to his neck the release a spinning saw blade
    612. tie piano wire around his neck, quickly rub it so it reaches his veins
    613. put his head in a piano and play Beethoven’s fifth on his spine
    614. put him in a piano wire net, tie it to a car, drag him around
    615. go interactive buddy on his ass
    616. have him fight Blackbeard
    617. replace his safety net with piano wire
    618. replace trampoline with piano wire net
    619. tity twister with grenade pins
    620. he works in a nuclear power plant. Take a sniper rifle, shoot him, his lifeless body will fall on a button and blow up the plant and the town.
    621. take a very sharp sword, shove it through him, turn the blade so its facing up, then spit him in half
    622. take a heavy war hammer ,put it on a spinning table. Put him on his knees then watch his reaction as the hammer comes to his face.
    623. trap him under a fire truck then set the truck on fire. He will die and the fire truck on on fire is funny
    624. have him party with a wild snorlax
    625. send him to camp Crystal Lake
    626. have him try to steal a hoe from a pimp
    627. take a cafeteria tray, hack at his neck with the thin bit till his blood flow across the ground
    628. Piss off Darth Vader
    629. have him become a treki, he will kill himself cause his life sucks
    630. pick his nose with long knives
    631. have him criticize a German sniper
    632. Make him challenge Hulk Hogan to a roid off
    633. invite him to a bond fire. Hes the fire wood
    634. make him watch the hills. Instant suicide
    635. Shaq attack
    636. put a Kelly Clarkson shirt on him, bring him to a Slipknot concert.
    637. Choke him with the American flag, stab him with the staff.
    638. Drag him to the underworld and feed him to Cerberus
    639. A bill board “falls” on him
    640. Drive a snowplow through his room
    641. Drop him in an octopus tank that has a really pissed off octopus in it.
    642. strap him to the Eiffel Tower and blow it up.
    643. land a 747 on him
    644. put him in a blimp then recreate the Hindenburg accident
    645. speak polish to him (beat him with a metal pole)
    646. Build a giant magnet. Use it to bring down a satellite on him
    647. have him live next to a Nuclear Power plant. He’ll die from Radiation poisoning
    648. Send him to a town built on a radioactive dump. Mutants will kill him
    649. Rip out his eyes, cut off his fingers and toes. Cut out his tongue and rip out his teeth one bye one. He’ll bleed to death.
    650. crush him with a computer from the 1950’s. Google it if you don’t know what one looks like.
    651. rig the walls of a room to jut out spikes. Then have them slowly close together. Once everything is prepared, throw him in the room
    652. On his toilet seat, place a pressure sensitive bomb. It will blow the **** out of him.
    653. put him in a medieval catapult and aim him towards a venomous snake pit.
    654. blow him up in a snake pit.
    655. Leave him for the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse
    656. Push him out of a plane and have him land a on a church steeple
    657.Dress him up as a KKK member and drop him off in the Middle Of Brooklyn of Compton
    658. send him to Sudan or Darfur and tell the Janguweed that hes Christian
    659. strap him in the Apparatus from the Penal Colony
    660. Shoot a flaming arrow at his head
    661. shoot multiple flaming arrows through his head
    662. give him a sedative, put him in a helicopter with a drunk driver
    663. stab him with a pen, dies from ink poisoning
    664. Stab him with a knife, pour in into the wound.
    665. Give him five shots of acid. He will freak out and jump out of the window to get away from the monster that is really just a house plant.
    666. Natural causes
  2. Jun 26, 2010
    heres some help for afterwards
  3. Jun 23, 2010
    Put Poop in his mouth and nose till he drowns or can't breath.
  4. Aug 19, 2010
    I wanna see way #666!!!
  5. Oct 22, 2007
    So this is what happens when mental problems have sex with tards... Sigh...
  6. Jun 4, 2006
    http://fans.wwe.com/crazytrain4/blog/2010/07/28/666_ways_to_kill_someone meh
  7. Aug 8, 2008

    Hey man you should check out creature feature, you might like the music, Or atleast the lyrics.