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Need advice on a lecture.

Discussion in Entertainment started by Anathema, May 10, 2012

  1. Feb 18, 2011
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    I recently applied to do a talk at a TEDx event. For those of you who do not know what TED is, go to TED.com and look at some of their videos. They are pretty much the intellect's youtube. I got in and have been working diligently on my topic because my allotted time is 10 min. I will be doing the talk Saturday at around 8, and I feel like I am missing something. So I was wondering if you guys had any advice on what to add, what I should do in terms of gestures and statures. If you have never done a public speech or talk you can still post with advice, but I am not looking for obvious answers along the lines of 'don't fuck up' or 'talk clear'. If the talk is good enough, it will get uploaded to the actual site (which is something I want to shoot for :grin:)

    My topic is based on how we let emotions cloud our judgment when redefining the idea of bullying, causing it to become something that it shouldn't be.

    I just want ideas, throw whatever you think might be interesting to add in, whether it be a personal experience of the bully or being bullied, your personal definitions, changes that morphed the definition to what it is now, and even solutions to it. If I can add it, I will add it.
  2. Aug 1, 2011
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    I guess a good idea is that people do not take The idea of bullying seriously. Well, bak when I was a kid at least. People/teachers wouldn't do much about it, they would just say "alright ill take care of it" but in reality, they did nothing. Physical and psychological bullying are not taken seriously at all, and although physical bullying gets SOME attention (not as much as it should), psychological bullying gets none. "stocks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" is a load of crap. Take it from someone who was bullied from 4th grade to about...I'd say 11th grade. 12th grade even. Shit will get to you and it hurts. I just think people don't take child bullying seriously enough.

    Edit: I would also like to add that too many people define bullying as a physical beating/harassment. That is not the case. The psychological side of bullying is just as bad, if not worse than the physical side.

    I hope this helped you out Ana
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Jan 12, 2011
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      I've had my own experiences with bullying and I find the emotional perspective of it intriguing. However, I'll have to leave my paragraph reply until a bit later since I have a couple things to do right now. Sorry :/
    • Feb 18, 2011
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      Interesting. I was focused on how nowadays adults look at bullying as anything not positive. Sure there still is bullying, but I wanted to work towards a solution that actually works, rather than passing a law saying "Bullying is an imbalance of power, and you aren't allowed to fight back." A lot of the statistics that say 300k kids skip school every day because they are bullied turns parents into helicopter parents. Emotions got the best of them and drove them away from solving the problem, to making their kids feel safe. I have solutions that might not work for everyone so I want to employ collective problem solving to come up with an answer that can help everyone.
    • Apr 2, 2011
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      Heh Ana... we talked for quite a whiles in mumble about this. All I said there... pretend I typed it out ^^
    • Feb 18, 2011
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      Yeah I did inclue some things in there too, youl see. :razz: @Jon
    • Aug 1, 2011
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      Wish I had been in mumble. I have plenty of experience with this haha!
    • Feb 18, 2011
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      Good to know. People said they liked my talk so hopefully it will go good enough to get on the site.
    • Jan 12, 2011
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      That Guy brought up a very interesting aspect of bullying - the psychological side of it. I'll now elaborate on it. INCOMING WORDS.

      To begin, bullying is traditionally thought of one of a few scenarios: as a larger person picking on a smaller person, as a group of people picking on an individual, or as an individual picking on one or more people. These different options can easily be physical in nature, with direct contact to people (a nudge, push, slap, etc.) or by indirect contact (rubber band, water balloon, etc.). It can be masked as "pranking," but it still may ultimately demonstrate bullying, depending on who's on the receiving or spectating ends of it. Should a parent, teacher, or other authority be told of what's happening by someone, usually a brief effort is made to directly address the bully, depending on grade and number of offenses (such as talk, time out, detention, suspension, councilor/administrator visit, etc.).

      That covers what I think involves the physical end of it. Usually quickly recognized and handled. However, there's a much deeper side of bullying that gets a lot less attention because it's a lot harder to spot or report: the psychological side. Psychological bullying can be either aided by physical contact or not, but it typically involves manipulating a recipient's views of him/herself or others. Psychological bullying can also take place between any two people or groups in any arrangement regardless of sex, age, or physical/mental capacity. It lends itself to mystery because it goes far beyond our normal schema for a bullying situation. Adults can either depend on the bullied person(s) to speak up, but unlike physical abuse, parents or teachers would have to take a more active role in finding it since this bullying may be reported a lot less. Typically, it may involve verbal or gestural harassment, exclusion from groups, unfounded teasing or rumors, or other things that aren't physical in nature. Since distinguishing it from otherwise playful banter may sometimes be difficult, it has much to do with perception. I'll go into this more in the next sections.

      In no particular order, I'll now go into different reasons for the bullying (physical and psychological).
      1) A confidence/status boost. I won't spend long here since this is obviously one of the most common thoughts of why bullies target others. By abusing others physically or psychologically, they may gain a boost in their personal confidence, esteem, or ego. This may be to increase influence, recognition, attitude, or compensate for some other issue. It may be caused by arrogance, delusion, or a need to feel better about oneself (more below).
      2) Resentment. Not quite the same as the previous reason since there is a deeper motivation to it. The bully may feel resentment in not being as successful as others or not being as socially accepted, so they must do something to become noticed. While this seems counterproductive, it's all about perspective. From their view, they are being given attention for a status they accomplished. They may or may not be aware of the harm they cause others, but they pursue this option regardless since it might be the "only way" to be noticed. From a practical stance, diminishing comments, back-hand remarks, or sarcasm may serve as their best outlet of feelings without actually admitting them out of discomfort. I know this still seems odd, but just think about it.
      3) Social expectancy. I wouldn't go so far as to say that it's what they saw on TV, but our socially expected "bully behaviors" has a reciprocating effect on bullies. Bullies behave a particular way because that's how they believe they should act given the background on how to make others feel worse. If someone is raised on how to identify bullying, they can use that as a tool themselves. Further on, if a person is feeling isolated or mistreated by others (literally or perceptually) then they may use this observed behavior to "defend" themselves. I may be going out on a limb here, but if a person bullies based on how they think the role is supposed to, it reinforces the way bullies are perceived by others, which in turn reinforces how other others see the role. Like the last one, it's a bit odd, but it makes sense if you view the bully as the victim.
      4) Anonymity. This is very apparent on the Internet, but also applies to group rumors or bathroom stalls. People can act out against others for their own amusement, anger, or other motivation. They can write or speak whatever they feel because there is no consequence of being personally discovered and punished. This is obviously harder to deal with without invading another's privacy, a double-edged blade which is arguably dependent on the situation. The bully's anonymity makes them very powerful because they have no face. This facelessness acts three-fold on the recipient - one is the verbal or written content itself, the second is the ripple in the audience and how much they either choose to acknowledge or ignore the content, and the third is the sense of helplessness in trying to punish the offender. A couple examples include "Hate them, post their info" on 4chan, and on Internet servers (our own CSS for instance) when a person with an accent or tone of voice becomes "noticed" ingame.

      (Can't think of good transition... Blarg.)
      Psychological bullying is a very subjective form and it can appear in disguise as a normal conversation. It has a lot to do with context, intent, and the people. Many people may not even recognize it as bullying if they're on the receiving end since they may rationalize it away. "Perhaps that person is having a hard day" or "Maybe they're right and I need to work harder to do well." Sometimes even if the victim is aware that they're being bullied, they are either unsure of how to address it or they are unwilling out of shame or intimidation. That is where people's emotions can cloud their judgement. The uncertainty of action to their own benefit or the concern of how seriously others may handle it is what can make bullying such a powerful force. It's not because that shove was really sudden or because those shoelaces really are goofy, but because of the significance individuals place on those actions. More especially the amount of thought or doubt given to certain comments can make people worry needlessly over them.

      Reflection on a comment can often make it seem personal or rooted by a collection of observations. People, as emotional as they may be, tend to seek reasons for situations they do not understand. These reasons can either calm their emotions or send them into a frenzy. Then when faced with adversary again, it can either be rationalized or a pattern may develop, casting doubt on the previous reasons. This can go any number of directions depending on the person and their dispositions, but everyone has their vulnerabilities. Emotions can be a useful tool for people to use to express themselves, but employing them at the wrong time can be potentially damaging to one's worth, reasoning, and overall stability. When a person exploits this for prolonged periods of time on another it can even become symbiotic, with both people expecting the outcome and being unwilling to change it. This is one reason why psychological bullying sometimes goes unreported for so long. Our perceptions of how mentally hardened we are just as fickle as our own emotions. When our own reasons are bent inward by an external stimulus, we basically do half the bully's work ourselves.

      The only way out of it is to consult with others to regain a perspective on it all and face the bully. Many times bullies aren't as tough as we might think. Many times bullies are reasonable too. Only sometimes are bullies really determined to cause trouble that they must be punished/restrained by others, but they are dealt with on an individual basis. Bullying can be as simple as a misunderstanding that grew into something larger or it could be a much more deeply rooted scenario of someone getting back at a group of stuck-up idiots that have made that person's life miserable. It requires patient understanding and proactive investigation, and emotions tend to either get in the way or just escalate it.


      Since I can't think of a good conclusion, I'll leave it at that. Sorry that I wrote so much and that it might be a bit thrown together, but I thought of a lot to discuss. Don't take these as facts, but just more considerations since behavior is a very hard thing to analyze. There are probably more things I can't remember that I wanted to type, but I hope these ideas are useful. :cute:


      Edit: Also, consider this a draft of ideas. There are some I probably could have spent more time on but meh. I've been typing for a while and didn't think too hard about it. Enjoy! :razz:
      Vadleon, May 11, 2012 Last edited by Vadleon, May 11, 2012
    • Aug 1, 2011
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    • Jan 12, 2011
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      Quoting this before you fix it. I'm amused by the smiley you accidentally generated.
      FYI it's TL;DR. :razz:
    • Aug 1, 2011
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      [IMG]
      • Friendly Friendly x 1
      • Jan 12, 2011
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        Actually this would be hilariously appropriate for your lecture, Ana. Say that it's interactive and start with this picture. Then go from there. :grin:
      • Feb 18, 2011
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        The talk went great! I will upload the video once it gets posted, thanks for the suggestions guys.
      • McKay
        This message by McKay has been removed from public view. Deleted by McKay, May 12, 2012.
        May 12, 2012
      • Feb 18, 2011
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        Yeah already did it :shock:.

        I didn't do a lecture with a script, I just remembered the ideas I was talking about.
      • Feb 20, 2011
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        Lol I just noticed the last comment before posting, deleted my previous one. I read the first few comments and then posted my advice xD
      • Feb 18, 2011
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        Still, it is what you are supposed to do in shit like TED. And its the thought that counts <3.
      • Feb 20, 2011
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        :heart: