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What Keeps You Going?

Discussion in Everything & Anything started by iProbie, Aug 29, 2013

  1. Apr 1, 2012
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    I'm still young, inexperienced and new to this world. I have to admit, I haven't had any "serious" hard times in my life before, just some minor ones that can be remedied easily. I am lucky enough and is grateful for that, but I have to prepare as I am not sure how long this "good life" will last.

    what keeps you going throughout hard times? what motivates you to rise again after plunging into the abyss? how does it feel to lose something big? share your experience and maybe not just me, but everyone can learn from your stories.

    to those who have gone through times of hardships and crises, I salute you and any close friends/relatives that helped you through, you are all fighters and I'm jealous of it.
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    • Mar 14, 2013
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      My very existence or the fact that I am alive is what keeps me going, and my loli's <3 eh hee~

      But in all seriousness whenever anything comes up , I try to stay positive and upbeat, it aint gonna do me no good thinking about the bad stuff all the time you kno
    • Jul 23, 2012
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      There was a time where love kept me alive and it kept me safe. Then I felt how devastating the shock of losing it can impact you, so I re-evaluated my life. At this point, nothing is keeping me going. I live simply because I want to, not because I have to.
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      • Nov 17, 2012
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        I look into the future and try to picture what I'll be doing, how I'll be living and I get motivation from that. Music tends to pump me up, get me motivated whether it's Two Steps from Hell, to Greenday, Pendulum or even the old Starcraft and Warcraft 3 soundtracks.

        Also, a nice Coffee or Farmers Union Iced Coffee keeps me going :grin: Probie, fly to SA and try one. Best COFFEE EVAR.
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        • Oct 11, 2012
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          It cannot be described in any way to understand it until you have been there. When I was 20 in my 3rd year of college my brother (5 years older) died while he was on vacation with friends. It was terrible. I remember that entire week like it was yesterday (this was almost 5 years ago now).

          I was at my girlfriend's apartment when my best friend called me (we grew up together, his mom still lives two houses down from my parents) and said the garage door at his moms house fell and he needs help getting it back up and wanted me to come back to our apartment so we could go fix it. Cool - no problem. A short while later I started the 15 mile drive back to my apartment. I was on a 5 lane interstate when I received a call from my boss at the time - he wanted to know if I had talked to my parents today... I'm thinking what the hell does my boss care? I tell him no I haven't and ask him what's up... at this point his voice gets a bit grim and I can tell something is going on. I ask him if they're fine and he just responded with well, it's about your brother... I ask is he hurt? and He just said, it's not good, you need to call your parents.

          I immediately hung up and called my father. I asked him what what going on and he said what are you talking about? I told him about the call from my boss and he just said has you best friend called you? At this point - it was evident something was extremely bad. I asked him if my brother was ok and he just said we'll talk about it when you get home. At this point, you realize... it's either death or almost death. I started yelling at my dad to tell me what was going on, swearing and cussing at him to tell me (note: I wouldn't normally yell or swear at my parents). I'm still driving down the interstate at this point... after a few minutes of yelling at him to tell me what's going on... he finally just said I've been told he passed away.

          It's at a moment like this... you knew and could tell this was the case, but just hearing those words is when it starts to become reality. I just lost it at this point. He kept telling me to pull over, they'll come get me... I just kept driving. To be honest I don't really even remember driving the last 5-10 minutes to my apartment. I do remember getting to a stoplight and just sitting through a green light crying with the car behind me honking.

          Skipping ahead, my friend drove me the 45 minute drive back to my parents house... when we pulled in there were already a lot of people over. I got out and hugged my parents for a while... seeing them so distraught (much less me too) was a terrible thing for a child to see of their parents.

          The next two nights and days I didn't sleep for more than maybe 30 minutes total. Having seen others in this situation and hearing they didn't sleep I always thought... why not? You need to.... well, now I know why. You literally don't even think about sleeping. Your mind is so flush with thoughts, racing with information, questions that you're body literally just never shuts down or seeks rest. It was the same way with eating, I just wasn't hungry even after barely eating anything.

          So, even laying down trying to sleep, it was just you lay in bed crying and thinking about everything - trying to comprehend and make sense out of something that won't make sense.

          Anyways, It took us 4 days working with authorities (due to the circumstances, it was treated as a homicide with police) to get his body transported back home. 4 days later after the body was received and prepared by the funeral home we went up there. At this point, you feel like you've been through everything. Wrong.

          We entered the room that held his casket from the far side. As soon as we stepped in the room, 50 feet away I saw the casket, half open and could see my brothers face. Uncontrollably I immediately lost it and began to sob/cry. It was all real at this point. It wasn't a terrible dream.

          It's been almost 5 years now, and it's still extremely tough to live with everyday. Over time, it's been easier to deal with and cope but it took several years. For at least 6-8 months I would drive home from work just crying the entire 45 minutes. There were times I didn't remember driving home - it was like I was in a trance, but still operating.


          I've never visited his grave even after 5 years. It's simply too difficult to do. Perhaps one day, I'll be able to make the trip for him.

          Going through all of this was hell. 20 years old, life is great, nothing can go wrong when everyone you know is healthy with no problems... Then I learned the life lesson that we are never promised tomorrow. We should always say goodbyes on good happy terms, because it could very well be your last.

          I used this as motivation to succeed in his honor. I worked full time and went to school full time my final 2 years - slept on average 25-30 hours a week. Taught myself how to program from the base of what he had taught me. I got a job at a software firm and busted my ass there for 3 years working my way up from jr. developer to a senior/team lead. I left that company 1 1/2 years ago and started my own consulting company. I now have 7 people who work for me (as contractors to keep my costs low) and have contracts with my State's government as well as various private companies. When I lost my brother I was making $10/hour. Since then, I've used his life and legacy to accomplish all of this and now make $100+/hour.

          It's been a tough road, but I've learned a lot through a bad situation. I've been very fortunate since then and have donated a lot back to places that helped me along the way. I have used my knowledge, success and financial well being to help two other people start and fund their own companies as well. I firmly believe in giving back and this is my way of helping others.

          Sorry this was so long, but hopefully it will inspire others to work hard and continue to seek to be the best even after they fail time and time again. Hard work does pay off, and when you experience tough times they can be used as motivation to live your life to the fullest while you can.
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          • Nov 11, 2011
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            Knowing that I'm at the bottom, and that I might have to stay there for long periods of time, made me tougher yet more sensitive to situations. I like helping people and that makes me feel better about going on. And for that, I want to go on.
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            • May 2, 2013
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              Well losing someone important... may feel like your world breaks apart. As for me, this may seem weird but i used a parents passing as a motivation to go farther in life and i dont know, accepting the situation for what it is did help a lot!!! Whats most important i think is not having regrets when things do happen, i didnt had any as i had spent the time i needed to with him!!!
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              • Jun 23, 2011
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                Knowing that having tasted happiness once

                it is a wonderful thing to look forward to
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                • Mar 4, 2012
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                  You should find a healthy hobby or passion that you can focus on when you're going through a hard time. I play my guitar whenever I am depressed, anxious or stressed. It really helps me out a lot. Churchill painted to "keep the black dog away" referring to his depression. From personal experience I would say that alcohol is not a good remedy nor is it a healthy one.
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                  • Jun 11, 2012
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                    Seeing someone else happiness before mine. Though at time this became bothersome and re-evaluate to what can make me happy, but the simple smile and gratitude I get from helping someone really helps me. In lament terms, I do stuff for other when stuff is good and they feel good I feel good.

                    When i see bold BS is just go, yeah...this is a waste of my time. Negativity looking for negativity will not render a positivity as though math speculated it.

                    Find a hobby. I love writing, doesn't matter what it is, just love it. When stressed, a nice soundtrack and some comic books.
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                    • Nov 29, 2010
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                      Life is a cruel unforgiving thing, at the same time it is very beautiful.

                      Day in day out, always look forward for the next day, no matter the circumstances. I live in a life where I can work for whatever I want, so what's stopping me?

                      The worst you can do is to live your life dictated by the people around you. You need to live your own life, you're just helping other people with theirs, what about yourself?
                    • May 15, 2011
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                      The tears of children.
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                      • Feb 8, 2013
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                        eh...I remind myself that things could be worse and remember the things that are important to me. Hobbies and past-times help as well, And if worse turns to worse I usually tell myself If i quit now all the past struggles that I have overcome would've been for naught and to not let past sacrifices go in vain.

                        well that and porn...
                        (Terabyte_of_Porn), Aug 29, 2013 Last edited by (Terabyte_of_Porn), Aug 29, 2013
                      • Jul 4, 2011
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                        Don't let your past haunt you.
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                        • Jul 8, 2012
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                          This is important.

                          Sent from my SCH-R970 using Tapatalk 4
                        • Oct 29, 2010
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                          Complacency.
                          meeko, Aug 29, 2013 Last edited by meeko, Aug 30, 2013
                        • Feb 27, 2012
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                          The only thing that really keeps me going is music, video games, and my best friend Eric. I absolutely adore music, and i have a song/genre/artist for every mood. Video games keep me sane. And my best friend Eric is just the greatest friend i could ever ask for, and we have quite a bit in common and stuff that i can relate to him. If it weren't for him, i'd have no friends at all.
                        • Mar 16, 2013
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                          From the wise words of Mitch Lucker I do agree with you there
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                          Music has helped me through billions of times, where I've been down, tossed out of society, groups who I thought were my friends, even my family, but as Mitch says, it gets you through life.


                          What keeps me going, and Im happy to tell everyone here this story, cause you are all a bunch of lovely men and women.
                          I suffered not the worst but a hard life whilst living with my father, he put me down every chance he could, considering he was in the Navy for 12 years, he is now a complete ass.. even though he is, I do still love him, but he did cause me to do things I wish I could take back, I self harmed, I hallucinated, I thought I was going insane at one point, and one day after school I when out for lunch with my mother, to talk about things that were happening at my dads, she saw scars, and after all that I never went to school, after 2 months, I got back into school, a better school, one where I didn't get bullied, I found mates who appreciated who I was as a person, and they helped me through a lot.

                          I got into heavy metal, because it gets my anger out, and helps me forget about the hard times I went through. many of you might not know these vocalists, but they are very famous and have been through alot in their childhood, and if they can get back on their feet? Then so can I.

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                        • May 31, 2012
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                          In nearly every scientific class (physics, chemistry, etc.) you learn about some kind of Conservation of Energy rule. Life has a way of balancing things out to preserve this rule and I believe this to be true even when bad things are happening.
                        • Aug 16, 2013
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                          Well iProbie, if you cut out all the emotional and psychological stuff, the best guarantor of happiness is money. Make sure you have enough of it. :grin: